Forgiving for the Gospel, Part 4, Philemon 8-11

Review:  Philemon was a Christian man from the city of Colossae, who was saved because of the ministry of the Apostle Paul.  Philemon was also a wealthy man because his house was big enough for a church congregation to meet in and he owned at least one slave.  It is this slave that our story turns.  His name was Onesimus and one day he stole some money from Philemon and ran away.  Once he escaped he made it all the way to Rome.  While in Rome trying to “get lost” in the busyness of Rome’s capital, he ran into none other than the Apostle Paul, who was himself under arrest and awaiting trial.  Paul the great evangelist led Onesimus to faith in Christ and the slave became free in the truest sense – “free from his sins”.  Jesus said, “the truth will set you free.  If the Son sets you free you are free indeed.” 

Somehow it came to light afterwards that Paul had in front of him a runaway slave belonging to a man he knew personally.  The right thing for Onesimus to do was go back to his master, Philemon.  After staying with Paul and helping Paul minister for a time, Paul sent Onesimus back, but not empty handed.  Paul wrote a personal letter to Philemon appealing to him as a friend.  He asked him to forgive Onesimus all wrong, and accept him back not as a slave, but, as a fellow brother in Christ.  So you can imagine the look on Philemon’s face as his prodigal slave stood before him, truly sorry, and as he read these words of the Apostle Paul.  Read verse 1-11)

Paul starts with identifying himself, then names the people he wanted to read the letter, and then takes time to specifically praise Philemon.  Now he is beginning his appeal in verse 8.

#1:  The Apostle’s Authority (v8)

          Notice first the Apostle’s Authority in verse 8, “Therefore, although in Christ I could be bold and order you to do what you ought to do”.  Paul does not mention the fact that he is an Apostle, but he is clearly referring to it in this verse.  People who have authority give orders and Paul could have come at Philemon with a command because of his Apostolic authority. 

          The highest human authority in the Church is the Apostle (1 Cor. 12:28; Eph. 4:11).  They were called and commissioned by God to be witnesses of the resurrection of Jesus Christ (Acts 1:22-23; 1 Cor. 12:28).  They were empowered to do miracles, healings, exorcisms and other wonders (2 Cor. 12:12).  They were given authority in the Church so that their teachings and instructions were binding upon the body of believers (2 Cor. 13:10).  They were the human vessels God used to establish the Church upon the earth (Ephesians 2:20).  After their purpose was fulfilled the age and office of Apostles discontinued (see here)

As an Apostle, when the occasion called for it he could be very bold.  Notice he says that he “could be bold”.  If you are familiar with Paul then you know that this is a very true statement.  When needed Paul could be severely bold.  Turn with me to 2 Corinthians 12:19-13:2, 10.  Another example is in Galatians 2:11-14. 

          Application:  Do we recognize apostolic authority?  Apostles were God’s highest human authorities in the early Church.  Paul’s appeal was the appeal of an Apostle, and, Philemon would be wise to carefully consider his beloved Apostle’s request.  But the authority of the Apostle’s continues to this day.  Not because Apostle’s still exist, but, because what they wrote is in the Bible.  Do we recognize Apostolic authority?  When we submit to the teachings of Scripture in the NT that is how we recognize that these men were God’s Apostles. 

#2:  The Apostle’s Affection (v9)

          Secondly we see the Apostle’s Affection in verse 9, “yet I appeal to you on the basis of love.  I then, as Paul – an old man and now also a prisoner of Christ Jesus”.  Paul was not one-dimensional.  As bold as Paul could be, it was not with boldness that he spoke to Philemon.  While he could be a lion Paul could also be a lamb.  He was sophisticated in his ability to persuade people.  In other words, he had more than a hammer in his tool box. 

So what we are seeing here is that Paul did not want to approach Philemon on the basis of his authority, but, rather, on love.  So he sets his apostolic authority aside and comes to him with love.  He wants Philemon to feel the full weight of the love he had in his own heart towards Paul - which would have been helped by thinking of Paul as an old man in prison.

          Paul is doing something here I think is great.  He is appealing to the high virtue of the Christian faith:  love.  If you look closely he is urging Philemon to do something that you can only do from love:  and that is forgive.  Love translates into forgiveness.  Maturing Christ-like love will be more capable of forgiveness.

But Paul doesn’t treat Philemon as though he were lacking in love.  Just the opposite – Paul knows that Philemon does “love” very well, which is why in verse 5 and 7 Paul praises him for his love.  Remember Philemon’s name actually means, “Beloved”, or, “Affection”.  So Paul is doing 2 things here I think we need to see when he appeals to Philemon on the basis of love. 

          First, he wants Philemon to draw out of that deep well of love that he already has in order to forgive Onesimus.  He wants Philemon to think of his own good character, his own good reputation, his own awareness of his own personal ethic in Christ and act according to it.  (Even to live up to it!)

          But secondly, Paul wants him to grow even further in an area that he already is very good:  love.  Paul is putting the issue of forgiveness before the man and it will challenge him to expand his love even further.  His love was going to have to be enlarged in order to forgive Onesimus.  In doing so, his capacity for love will have increased, and so he will be brought that much closer to the likeness of the Lord Jesus Christ and his love.

          Application:  Make your strengths stronger.  Keep growing in areas of your spiritual life you do well in already.  Growth is not just for the weak spots in our lives.  First Thessalonians 4:1 says, “Finally brothers we instructed you how to live in order to please God, as in fact you areliving.  Now we ask you and urge you in the Lord Jesus to do this more and more.”  Verse 10 says, “And in fact, you do love all the brothers throughout Macedonia.  Yet we urge you, brothers, to do so more and more.”  See how he affirms them that they are good at loving, yet, he urges them to become even better?  We will be challenged in aspects of our spiritual life to go from being okay to good to very good to excellent in areas of our Christian life.  So be careful when you begin to think “I do that pretty good”, because complacency will be challenged head on.  

Application:  How do we approach people when we are trying to persuade them?  Do we recognize when a soft touch is needed?  Or do we always use a hammer?  Proverbs 25:15 says, “… a gentle tongue can break a bone.”  That means that the power of persuasion is not always in aggressiveness, but, more often is found in gentleness.  Let us be sensitive to when gentleness is the best approach.  Let us be sensitive to when an appeal to love rather than authority is the best basis for persuading someone.

#3:  The Apostle’s Adoption (v10)

Thirdly, we see the Apostle’s Adoption, notice verse 10, “I appeal to you for my son Onesimus, who became my son while I was in chains.”  NT writers often referred to their congregations and converts as their children. 

Philemon has seen Paul as a prisoner, an old man, and now as a loving father.  A father who loves his son dearly - a son with whom Philemon had a grievance.  The angle here is that if you love the father you show that by loving his son.  We see that in our relationships – if you love your friend then there is a natural transference of love to his child that you develop.  You make me feel loved when you show my children your affection.  So it is too with God.  The Bible says to love God you must love His Son.  It was a powerful way to appeal to Philemon and another key to hopefully unlock all that love in his heart and let it come out.  Would Philemon’s great love for Paul now be reflected in loving his son?

But Paul is not just expanding the way Philemon sees Paul.  He is also expanding Philemon’s view of Onesimus.  He is helping his beloved friend see Onesimus as more than just a runaway slave and thief.  This is so key to forgiveness.  When we have a grudge we get tunnel vision – that is we can only see the other person for their offense against us.  In other words we lose sight of all the other ways to see them and we only see them in light of what they did to us.  Paul is moving Philemon around to see Onesimus from different angles in this letter:  Paul’s son (10), a servant of Jesus Christ (11), a brother in Christ (16), a great help in the work of the Gospel (11), a repentant man wanting to make things right (v12).  He didn’t want Philemon to only think about Onesimus as a criminal.

There is an application here for us:  If we are ever to forgive we must not succumb to this “tunnel vision”.  We must not allow ourselves to see them only in light of their sin against us.  The only thing this will do is fuel bitterness within us and perpetuates an unforgiving spirit.  We must pray earnestly and seek the Lord’s help to see them as the Lord wants us to see them.  This will help us open our hearts to the offender and forgive them.

This kind of forgiveness is not forced.  Nor is it done as a favor.  Paul is not asking a favor of Philemon, “Hey, I know you’re mad, but, could you do this for me buddy?”  Paul wants Philemon to own the decision.  He wants it to be all “Philemon” without any of “Paul” in the choice (v14).  Forgiveness is one of the greatest acts of free will.

There is a speculative point I want to suggest – a point that brings an application for us.  There is the possibility that Onesimus was God’s gift to Paul while in prison.  I doubt anyone had the resolve of the Apostle Paul.  But I don’t want to think of him as being more than human.  What I mean is that it is possible while he was in prison he could have had a passing thought, “Is everything I’m doing worth it?  Is the sacrifice and the work and the hardship making any difference?  Here I am in chains.  Man I’m a long way from the Damascus road.”  If that it is something Paul thought, then imagine the encouragement he would have had when God led Onesimus to Paul so Paul could lead him to Christ.  He could have been a gift from God to Paul to remind Paul that “Yes!  Everything you are doing does matter, it is making a difference, and it while it is spreading far beyond you it is also coming back to you in Onesimus.”  Application:  Never wonder if what you are doing for the Lord’s honor is effective.  Everything done for the honor of Jesus Christ and the spread of the Gospel will be effective.  God makes things grow.  Furthermore, the Lord is sensitive to those times when we need to be picked up.  Wow!  What a pick me up when Onesimus accepted Christ!  God knows what we need.

Underlying all of this is the basic point that Philemon should adopt Onesimus just as Paul did.  Accept him with the affection of a father towards a child.  If he did, unity and peace would prevail.  Paul was working to build unity in the church.  Paul wasn’t afraid of beatings, floggings, hunger, sneering or anything – except one thing.  He could handle all of those things, but the one thing he couldn’t bear was division in the Body of Christ (1 Cor. 1:10; Eph. 4:3).  You see here a man who almost – not quite – but on the verge of pleading with Philemon.  Coming from anyone it is persuasive.  Coming from a man who was an Apostle it was powerfully humbling.

#4:  The Apostle’s Assistant (v11)

          Lastly we see the Apostle’s Assistant in verse 11, “Formerly he was useless to you but now he has become both useful to you and to me.”  The name Onesimus literally means, “useful”.  Paul is playing on words here.  When Onesimus ran away Philemon had “no use” for him - he whose name was “Useful” became “useless”.  It reminds us of our Lord’s words, “If the salt loses its saltiness how can it be made salty again?  It is no longer good for anything…”  In other words, “what use is it?”  But now that Onesimus was a believer, he was useful again, and even more so than he was before.  He was useful to Paul, now Paul wanted Philemon to find him useful again.  Now he was useful both in Philemon’s house, and the house of God.  Now he was useful as a servant of Philemon, and a servant in the work of the Lord. 

Application:  When we get saved we become useful.  The Holy Spirit indwells us and gives each of us a spiritual gift to use for helping others grow in Christ.  Each of us actually become necessary to the whole body of Christ.  We can call this “Intentional Interdependence”.  God designed each of us to need each other.  No one is useless.  No one is dispensable.  No one can say “I am not useful” and no one can say, “that guy isn’t useful.”

Sidebar note:  This is why an unrepentant Christian is such a serious thing:  so long as they persist in worldliness and sin they forfeit their usefulness to Christ.  This is because our usefulness is predicated on our faithful pursuit of righteousness in our life.  Second Timothy 2:21 says, “If a man cleanses himself from [sin], he will be an instrument for noble purposes, made holy, useful to the Master and prepared to do any good work.”  An unrepentant sinning Christian is like a lame foot on the Body of Christ, unable to be used.  This is why restoring a sinning Christian is so important too:  to restore them back to a place of usefulness in building up the Body of Christ.

          Our usefulness has nothing to do with how talented or skilled we are, or aren’t.  First Corinthians 1:26 says, “Brothers, think of what you were when you were called.  Not many of you were wise by human standards, not many of you were influential, not many were of noble birth.”  Our usefulness has everything to do with the Holy Spirit – whom we’ve all been given.  If we have Him we are necessary to others and their growth and they are necessary for our growth.  The point is that it all starts with a recognition that you can’t do anything in and of yourself.  It’s what God does in you and through you.  “With man this is impossible, but, with God all things are possible.”  “Apart from Me you can do nothing.”  “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”  Robert Mc’Cheyane, “A holy minister is an awful weapon in the hand of God.