Ephesians 6:1-3, Children Who Honor Their Parents

Ephesians 6:1-3
Children Who Honor Their Parents

 

Our title today is “Children Who Honor Their Parents”.  Today we are looking into the Biblical teaching that children are to honor their parents.

 

This sermon is primarily directed at our children.  Next week we’ll look at parenting.  But, parents you can benefit today by understanding something very important.  It is very important to teach your children to honor you as parents.  Possessions, privilege, comfort, and ease of life are not what should be the greatest gifts you desire to give your children.  If these are the hopes and dreams for our children then we will create materialistic human beings who believe they are entitled to everything.  They will grow up without any sense of personal responsibility and if they have any character at all it will be weak.  We should not wish for the successes of this world for them, or that nothing bad ever happens.  No, as parents, we should discipline, train, teach and pray that their lives reflect the wisdom and righteousness of God.  Fundamental to that end is teaching our children to honor and obey us.

 

Let us look at 7 Traits of Children Who Honor Parents.

 

First, children who honor their parents because doing so is Right.  Notice verse 1 where Paul says, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.”  The first reason why you as a child should honor and obey your parents is because it is right.  What do we mean it is “right”?  We mean that it is right in the eyes of God.  And doing what is right in God’s eyes should motivate you.  Colossians 3:20 says, “Children obey your parents in everything for this is pleases the Lord.”  Children, over and over again the command for you to obey your parents is given along with the assurance that doing so is pleasing to God.  He looks favorably upon you when you choose to obey your parents because you are conscious of Him.  You have to care about what is right.  You have to have the kind of heart that cares about pleasing God.  If you do, then honoring your parents will be important to you.  Honor your parents because it is right to do so.

 

Second, children who honor their parents do so because they recognize Parents are the instituted authority in the home.  God judged Israel by letting them be ruled by children.  Isaiah 3:6 says, “I will make boys their officials; mere children will govern them.”  Since they rejected God’s ways and completely upended them, He was going to give them over to what they wanted – a complete reversal of God’s order society.  And from beginning to end God is watchful of how we respond to various authorities (i.e., government, church leaders, husbands, employers, parents).  God takes seriously whether a son or daughter honors their parents.  Honor your parents because you recognize they are the authority God has instituted in the home.

 

Thirdly, children who honor their parents do so because they follow the example of Jesus Christ.  Let me ask a question:  Who is Jesus Christ?  Jesus Christ is God’s Son.  And when God’s Son came into the world He obeyed His Father in heaven perfectly.  Jesus said in John 14:31 “the world must learn that I love the Father and that I do exactly what my Father has commanded Me.”  He said it again in John 12:49-50, “For I did not speak of my own accord, for the Father who sent me commanded me what to say and how to say it.  So whatever I say is just what the Father has told me to say.”  Everything it means to honor your parents is perfectly modeled for us in Jesus Christ.  He honored His Father in heaven perfectly. 

 

You know what that means?  It means that He perfectly obeyed His earthly parents as well.  Luke 2:51 says, “Then He [Jesus] went down with Joseph and Mary to Nazareth and was obedient to them.”  Listen, if any child ever had a reason not to obey His parents, it was Jesus.  He is God in the flesh.  He is the Creator.  Joseph and Mary, His earthly parents, are His creation.  He is perfect, holy and sinless.  They were part of the human race, therefore, sinners, and, and imperfect.  But, here Jesus is, God appearing in the flesh, submitting Himself to them as His human parents.  If He obeyed His parents, children, obey yours. 

 

Fourthly, children who honor their parents do so because God commands it.  In Leviticus 19:3 God said, “Each of you must respect his father and mother.”  In Deuteronomy 27:16 it says, “Cursed is the man who dishonors his father or his mother.”  It is of great importance to Him.  How important is it?  While Israel had over 600 commandments from God, there are only 10 commandments that God etched onto stone with His own hand.  One of those ten, the 5^th to be exact, is that children are to honor their parents.  Exodus 20:12 says, “Honor your father and mother so that you may live long in the land your God is giving you.”  It is repeated again in Deuteronomy 5:16, “Honor your father and your mother, as the LORD your God has commanded you, so that you may live long and that it may go well with you in the land the LORD your God is giving you.”  This commandment makes the top ten.

 

But what makes this even more important is that if you look at the structure of the 10 commandments you see that the first 4 commands pertain to a person’s relationship with God.  The rest of the 6 commands pertain to a person’s relationship with others.  Now notice this.  As soon as God gives the first four commandments, He begins to list the commandments which govern our relationship with other people.  What is the first commandment that God gives governing our relationship with others?  “Honor your father and your mother” (Ex. 20:12; Dt. 5:16). 

 

This is extremely important to note here:  Honoring parents comes before the commandments not to murder, steal, commit adultery, give false testimony or covet.  The first commandment God wanted to put down that governs how we relate to others was how we relate to our parents.  This indicates that perhaps the most important element of social order is that there is proper order in the home.  Proper order in the home will produce order in society.  If you want to break a society, break the home.  This is why the descriptions of the last days - when human society will be at its worst in history - includes the rebellion of children.  Turn to 2 Timothy 3 with me.  Paul describes what it will be like in the last days [Read v1-4]. 

 

I want to show you one more description of the last days.  Turn with me to Romans 1:28.  Paul has said that when people reject God and worship idols they become sexually immoral (v22-24).  When they persist, they go even further and engage in homosexuality (v25-27).  [Read verse 28-32].  There are over 30 items on this list of sins.  These are what develop when a society rejects God.  Right in the middle of all of them in verse 30 it says that they disobey their parents.  Who are “THEY”?  They are those who suppress the truth in their wickedness (v18), who refused to glorify God as God (v22), who exchanged the truth of God for images (v23), and those who worshipped and served created things rather than the Creator (v25).  What happens when “they” do that?  They go off the deep end, as Paul describes here.  Look at the condition of this society that Paul describes.  It’s a wreck.  And in the middle of this wreck we see that the order in the home is destroyed:  they disobey their parents. 

 

What I want to show here is that God considers disobedience to parents to be as serious a sin as he does these other sins.  Children who honor parents do so because God commands it. 

 

Fifthly, children who honor their parents do not want to remind God of His enemy.  I want to show here that rebellion against parents is not reflective of Christ, but, of Satan.  Who was the first to rebel?  Satan.  Who was Adam and Eve’s Father?  God was.  He created them.  They weren’t “born” the way that we all have been.  They were directly formed into existence by God’s hand – God was their Father.  As their father He gave them the one command.  In Genesis 3 we see that they disobeyed their Father and in doing so dishonored Him.  But who was active in that whole scene to deceive them, tempt them, and lead them into rebelling against God?  Satan.  He was created by God, God was also his Father because He created Satan.  He rebelled against God and he does so still to this day.  He blasphemes God, he lies about God, he aggressively dishonors God and wherever you see this it is a reflection of the wicked work of Satan. 

 

What am I getting at?  I am getting at this:  It is a disgraceful thing for children to dishonor their parents.  For a child’s conduct towards his parents to mirror Satan’s conduct towards God is disgraceful.  The home is the primary place where God’s righteousness and truth are to be on display.  When children honor their parents they reflect Jesus Christ.  When a child dishonors his parents he reflects Satan.  God is pleased when you honor your parents.  It is a respectable and venerable sight to watch a child voluntarily submit to his parents.  In order to have proper order in the home children must honor their parents. 

 

 

            Sixthly, children honor who honor their parents do so because they know they will be Better Off.  Notice verse 3, “………….”  It is a rule in Scripture that God blesses obedience.  He does not bless disobedience – including rebellion against parents.  One of the reasons God judged Israel and sent them off into Babylonian captivity was because society had deteriorated so much that the norm was children revolting against their parents.  Ezekiel 22:7 is part of a long list of sins God is listing against Israel, and right there He says, “In you they have treated their father and mother with contempt”.  As a matter of fact, in Deuteronomy 21:18-21 the Law provided that extremely rebellious and disgraceful children could be stoned.

 

            But, as displeased as He is, God is equally as pleased with children honoring parents.  So much so that we see two blessings attached to such honor:  a better life and a longer life.  Warren Wiersbe says this:

 

“Paul does not mean that everyone who died young dishonored his parents. He was stating a principle: when children obey their parents in the Lord, they will escape a good deal of sin and danger and thus avoid the things that could threaten or shorten their lives. But life is not measured only by quantity of time. It is also measured by quality of experience. God enriches the life of the obedient child no matter how long he may live on the earth. Sin always robs us; obedience always enriches us.

 

Children who honor parents do so because they know they will be better for it.

 

            Seventh and Lastly, children who honor their parents Obey them.  Notice what Paul says here in the passage in Ephesians 6:1 “…………..”  The Greek word for “obey” is hupakouo.  It’s a word that means to submit to, like putting yourself under another person’s authority. 

 

This word is different than the word Paul used to describe a wife’s submission to her husband.  The word Paul used for a wife meant that she was to submit to her husband, but, it was a word that conveyed she is an equal with her him.  The word used for children however is different and it means the submission of someone who is not equal with the person they are submitting to.  While Paul never uses this word to describe wives and husbands, it is the word he uses for children submitting to parents.

 

What does it mean to obey?  It means to do what they say.  Live to please them.  Recognize they are the authority and Submit yourself to their authority (5:21).  Keep an attitude of submission towards them.  Keep yourself in proper rank.  So long as you are under their roof you are under their rules.  If you are dependent on them you are obligated to them.  Do what they say. 

            Don’t spend your days disrespecting your parents, revolting against them, lying, defying their authority or otherwise challenging them.  God gives government the sword (Rom 13:3-4) but He gives parents the rod (Pvb. 13:24; 19:18; 22:15; 23:13-14; 29:15,17). 

 

            Love them.   Seek to please them.  Seek to please God. 

 

Conclusion:

The Greatest act of obedience was by Jesus Christ.  He obeyed His Father in heaven perfectly.  When the greatest pressure ever to be faced by anyone was upon Him in the garden, Jesus Christ prayed, “Father, if it is possible for this to be any other way….yet not My will but Yours”.   Not my will, father.  Your will Father. 

Have you thought about the magnitude in which those words changed history?  The obedience of Jesus Christ to His Father has changed the course of human history.  He obeyed His Father, willingly, voluntarily, by going to the cross.  That was His Father’s will for Him.  And it was His will for Himself. 

He laid down His own life upon the cross to bear the burden of the whole world.  That burden is the sins of the whole world.  He died there upon a cross for our sins.  That was His mission for coming into the world.  That was what the Father sent Him for.  That was what He came for.  And now, human history is changed forever.  Now, men and women have the way of salvation opened up for them.  Jesus died so that we can live.  Jesus took the punishment for our sins so that we can be pardoned.  God gave up His only Son so that He could adopt us as His Sons and daughters.